November 26, 2010

Feeling emo, yet not emo. I couldnt find a word to describe how im feeling right now. The feeling just dont feel great!!

I need htht like seriously… );

November 25, 2010

HAHA! I just remembered that i have another blog and went to take a browse. The very first post was on 2005!! It’s like 5 years ago and the content is really OMG! hahaha.

“few of my friends say they will go celebrate christmas
i was like huh ?
christmas how to celebrate?
Counting down ?
haha
yupp
they r counting down
haha
i was thinking
there will be alot of ppl also counting down
and town will be crowded with ppl
and i hate it
and they will onli be home ater midnight
haha
imagine they are squeezing with ppl on the train ..
so terrible…”

HAHAAA!! I cant believe that i actually dont like counting down, but now it’s like a routine every year.. And the way i typed is reallly sec 3 standard! HAHAA.

“i also think tat i use too much com le
everydae i on and off onli at 11+
veri late horh”

If im able to off my laptop and sleep at 11pm, it’s a PLEASURE already. Should have spend my time sleeping in the past..

I was so childish in the past, but that’s understandable because i was a child then! HAHAA

“and also thanks suan ern
she so good
she help mi take tissue
and ask mi if i am ok on msn
hahaa
so caring
and i felt so touched
hahaa”

And now, she has become my dearest TWIN! :)

“early in the morning went mac and eat breakfast wif 3 guys

and they are mr evil, my lao shi and jianxiong…”

When can we go and have breakfast together again?!! It was 1st APRIL 2006!! Almost 5 years..

“i so long never chat wif the person liao..
i suddenly feel tat i dunnoe who ‘tat person’ is
sian….
i finally understand wad is meant by
time speaks everything…
i wanted to tell tat perosn wad happened…
but somehow, i jus dun feel like bringing it up
i find no point in bringing the past up…
it onli brings sadness n nth else…
sometimes, we mus learn to let go some of the things
or else, we will b suffering if we hold on to it strongly…
i shall let go….
step by step…
i will suceed de…
i noe…
it all depends on the time n myself….”

Really wondering who ‘the person’ is.. HHAHA

November 14, 2010

It has been almost to a year since ‘you’ were gone. And i will always remember it was the day when bits and pieces of feelings started to build up. I know i need to let it go, somehow, someway.

There’s so many things i wanted to say 5 minutes ago, yet, i’m lost for words now.

‘Giving is always better then accepting’, and i always believe this. I dont care what i would get at the end, but if i think it is worth, i will just do it. Sometimes, you no need any reasons to do anything or something for someone.

Should i carry on or should i just cut it off? Cut it off earlier the better? I know i’m contradicting, yet i just cant seems to find the correct way out. I need some light..

Study seems to be the only way out to keep me busy and stop all those thinkings. When you are tired, everything and anything doesnt matters anymore..

Everything seems to be in a complicated state now..

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November 7, 2010

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November 4, 2010

Just when i feels that im alright, reality pulls me back to tell me, im not. And there’s always something else to rub into the salt to make it worse.
Im living my life everyday as if i’m on a rollercoaster. Sometimes, very high! but sometimes very low! And there’s totally no in between. IM TIRED AHHH!!!
I’m already trying to look as happy as i can already, OVER emo is so not me. Im trying my best to portray the old jessica..
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